Coffee shop worker made up lies about me and told the lies to my boss and other senior bankers

For context, I have always been nice to the service staff at the coffee shop downstairs near the office building. One day, the server noticed me coming into the coffee shop with my boss and a couple other senior bankers. Since then, the next time my boss & the senior bankers went downstairs to get coffee without me, the server made up lies about me and spread those lies to my boss and others from the office. What should I do?

 

Like I am a horrible person…. And that I am rude and condescending to all the coffee shop workers (… despite the fact that I even previously tipped them)

 
Most Helpful

To be honest, if those are the lies made about you, and nothing worse, I doubt the seniors are going to really care much.

Some senior bankers are almost proud of being obnoxious, so it isn't necessarily going to shock them -- especially if the firm I am thinking of, with a coffee shop downstairs.

When I initially read about lies being told about you, I assumed it might be something serious... like harassment, or something sexual, racial, religious, drugs, perhaps crude language, something unbecoming of a banker, or company related (embezzlement, etc), or otherwise criminal. If anything like that, it's totally different.

However, if the coffee shop barista said you were rude, arrogant, a jackass, or whatever, I doubt anyone will care much.

A bank with a coffee shop downstairs, tends to narrow it down a bit, for some of us around the scene... If it's where I think you are, I really don't think they will care (and those seniors were likely even worse, when they were in your shoes lol).

• I would tread lightly, and try not to interact with the coffee shop people much, because if they are talking about you, especially falsely, then you don't want to put yourself in a situation of giving them more opportunity of claiming something.

• I would also stop tipping. A barista is already paid hourly, and the tip would be to reward service. I wouldn't reward an attack against your reputation, and so I would stop tipping. In some cases, I've seen where some will try to do something like this to manipulate a higher tip, but it's absolutely misplaced, and I would not reward that behavior any further. Be aloof and not too familiar, keep it transactional, and make sure not to put yourself in a situation where they might say something else.

Good luck.

Investor (30+ years); IB/RE/PE/Corp (MD level); currently, head of boutique private equity firm; principal of family office.
 

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