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You don't want to hear my hardest take
Give it to me. I promise I have a harder take
My hardest take is that none of these takes below ↓↓↓ are hard at all
ive been to italy, ive been to france, i speak french, ive been to spain, ive been to south america, ive been to kenya, ive been to china, i backpacked across europe, i prefer tea to coffee, ive been to greece, i love greek food, im a foodie, im always on the lookout for a great little place to get breakfast, sometimes i go to barnes and noble and lose track of the time, i love my mackbook, but i also love my mackbook pro - because it has the word pro on it, the matrix and inception are the first movies in the last 10 years that made me really think, to bend the spoon you have to realize that there is no spoon, oh and one more thing - if you dont know the difference between your and youre - youre and your - then youre a fuckin idiot get the fuck off of my facebook wall
Hardest take (and I believe this sincerely): all investment bankers are idiots. They missed out on their entire lives.
-Grinded since high school to get into top colleges -Spent all their time networking, getting good grades, joining nonsense finance clubs, doing "coffee chats," connecting and cold-emailing on LinkedIn -Work 70-120 hours/week, including weekends -Unfulfilling work (formatting slides) -Make so much money but are always in the office and can't spend it
When really, you could have gone to Penn State University and joined the Nittany Lion fund and gotten a job at a BB IBD like everyone there does lmao
Penn State alum?
Not yet an alum
He is theaccountingmajor
Wait you said that all investment bankers are idiots, as they work too hard doing boring shit for money they cant spend, so they should have just joined the Nittany Lion fund and become investment bankers?
Moving past the failed logic, I didn't do IB for the reasons you said. If the goal is to get to "fulfilling work" ASAP, the recommended paths are typically IB/Consulting/ and (to a lesser extent) Big 4. You'll run into all the same unfulfilling long hours at all of them. If you think formatting powerpoints sounds shitty, just wait until you are tying out a 10k at 3am.
No no. You missed my point. I think investment banking is dumb. But doe the people who actually want to do that, why not take the easy route?
We mothafudgin are!!!!!!
The easy way in:
Maybe I'm just terribly uninformed (likely) but I have no idea what you mean by "the easy way."
Penn State isn't a great school and I hear that getting into the Lion Fund is very tough, making that "easy" course of action quite difficult. If it were so easy to land a spot in a BB through Penn State then surely everyone would do that.
Hardest Take:
The office is an average show, at best a 5/10.
The office is snowflake humor
Agreed, Pam and Jim suck.
Best statement yet. Fully agreed that the office 5/10 @ best.
Beyonce is the single most overrated musician/performer of all time.
my wife and I were just talking about this, completely agree
She is nothing more than a massive troll.
Of course the comment with the most bananas is the least controversial or "HARD."
did i call it far up above? am i genuis or what?
Who should be given Beyonce praise for musical performance? I'm sure Beethoven would rival her with his wicked fast fingers.
A hot dog is a sandwich.
Going to need a harder take than this
A taco is a sandwich
A hot dog is a sub
Story time: Theres a student committee at my university that manages part of the schools endowment by investing it. Every few years part of the gains are liquidated and distributed to other campus organizations.
I interviewed for the committee a few years ago (portfolio manager in the committee now) and the interview was with the committee's CIO and three portfolio managers. The first few questions were standard qualitative interview questions (strengths, weaknesses, resume walkthrough, etc.). Then we had a few easy technical questions ("say depreciation increases $10, how would this affect each of the financial statements?"). After that, I had to pitch a stock (I pitched Visa), and the interview seemed like it was wrapping up.
Then the CIO goes "Alright cube44, this is our most important question yet. Is a hot dog a sandwich?"
Me: "hahahaha you had me nervous for a second there... uhh I'm gonna say no."
CIO: "Why? This isn't some joke throwaway question. We genuinely want you to take a second and think this through. Do you seriously think we'd waste our time asking kids like you unimportant questions? Give us a real answer."
Me: "Uhh okay. I'm going to say its not a sandwich because the bun connects at the bottom and typically sandwich buns don't connect."
Portfolio Manager 1: "Dude, submarine sandwich buns usually connect. Are seriously going to sit here with a straight face and tell me subs aren't sandwiches? We don't like it when people try to waste our time."
At this point I was essentially shitting myself because these guys were fairly intimidating and were actually keeping straight faces the entire time. One of the portfolio managers was furiously scribbling down notes in a notebook and shaking his head disappointedly.
I ended up settling on the explanation that a hot dog is not a sandwich purely because of our societal understanding of the word "sandwich". They asked a few more hard joke questions after that and I got a spot in the committee.
Hard take: Feminism is a thing because men are afraid of being alone.
This is the only way people that believe in evolution can explain why we do not also live by the rules of nature and the survival of the fittest: at some point it became a survival method to coddle the weak.
Hard Take2: Feminists will reap the pain of their designs; if men did not fear being alone, that wall would hit them faster and harder.
Bitcoin/crypto is worthless and the only reason that its kept around is so CORRUPT politicians like Hillary Clinton can be paid anonymously.
(A co-worker's take, not mine)
That's how Mafee got paid as well tho
Well his 1ml in cyrpto was right before Bitcoin crashed, so he only ended up getting 200k
I'm just curious, why do you say that the main reason is corruption?
it's actually for buying drugs on the internet tyvm
IB keeps its rep because no one will admit they slaved away their undergrad earning perfect grades to simply slave away at an IB as a glorified assistant. Therefore IBD analysts make it sound "baller" with how much money they make and how they are closing deals. In reality, they are powerpoint b!tchboys (aka the deck and CIM) who make pretty presentations to the sellers of businesses. Modeling is part of the job, but not a huge part. Despite what you learn in the CFA, valuation does not equal price. Some of you were bashing me for my comp valuation I was attempting awhile ago and how I should use free cash flows. Look, we are looking to buy a company at the lowest price possible and justify it by comps in the market, not do a DCF valuation and pay what the company is hypothetically worth 10 years from now.
IB is like spring break. Have any of you ever went for one? Every year tons of horny frat boys go South to places like Cancun, South Padre and Miami to party and hook up every night with ease like MTV made it out to be. I am here to tell you that it was all a ruse. When I went on spring break, it was easily 10 to 15 guys per girl, and most girls kept close to their crew since they know what our agenda was. The truth was far from what MTV made it out to be. However, no guy was going to admit they blew $2000 on a spring break that was shittier than the run of the mill weekend in their college town; so they lie and say it was crazier than a GGW gang bang.
There you have it folks. The cat is out of the bag.
The sad thing is that almost no college kid will actually believe you
Why did you copy and paste your second paragraph from an old post
Unless you were the one that originally posted it, I don't remember
that's my post from the Piper thread.
Protip: If you hear from a bunch of average dudes that a certain party spot is awesome, AVOID IT. Miami can be good but you NEED to go to the top clubs. Very much like Vegas in that respect. Vegas is awesome if you're at Omnia or Marquee. I love Vegas but that's only about 5% of Vegas. You'd have the same shitty experience if you went to the shit tier hotel bars where the promoters promise cheap drinks. If you're a dude and a promoter is promising you cheap anything, you're in the wrong spot. You couldn't pay me to stay at the New York New York or
The harder to get into, the better the place usually is. This is true with parties and also true with life. Every random dude can go to the beach in Cancun. If you were a hot girl, would you go there, knowing that?
If you were a baller CEO, would you go to the random networking event on Meetup.com, or would you go to an elite country club? Exact same thing with parties and hot girls.
There are hot girls in college sororities who go to run down frat houses, party all the time, and graduate with a $40,000 a year substitute teacher job, and then go to cheap bars for the rest of their lives and Cancun on spring break.
There are hot women everywhere. Wealthy women, well, not so much.
I never give SB's. EVER. But you, my good sir, have earned an SB. Great post.
i dont think anal is desirable for anyone involved
@Isaiah_53_5" is this true?
hey! all we do is hold hands
Thank you. I never understood the popularity of anal on porn sites.
Hard take: Most CEOs are psychopaths
You absolutely have to be a psychopath to become a F500 CEO. 100% agree with you. Therefore, luke warm take.
Give me some examples
Is it your opinion, or there was a kind of survey?
I don't want to speak for YungMonc However, a study was done several years ago about this topic: https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/13/1-in-5-ceos-are-psychopaths…
People in business are overrated in their intelligence, and very insecure about their intelligence.
obvious facts cant be hard takes
Every single person that you have ever cared about will be dead soon.
you wanna go dark? let's do it
since when is the truth dark?
if my life doesn't really matter then why am I still here?
Heh, I like this.
To expand - nothing matters and we grasp desperately, futilely, for meaning and a greater purpose. The heights of joy and depths of pain we feel are illusory, because our personal experiences are just our own perceptions. Look closer and think harder about the few times that you felt were truly meaningful and realize that they're objectively fleeting and dull.
Understand that your only options are ignorance of your own (and everyone's else's) pitiful state or a Sisyphean struggle.
Real talk here. This is actually all fine; so long as you have an easy ignorance switch you can flip at will, you can still be blissfully happy. Actually, for most people, I think that switch is stuck on on until something traumatic happens. It's probably better this way.
animals too
Best statement not to say when the plane is taking off.
Deontology is the worst intellectual contribution of the western world to itself and the world.
Evolution is not science
Jordan Peterson is a charlatan.
Finance is gibberish
Correct. A grown man telling other grown men to make their beds.
How is evolution not science, lol, did you go to public school in Texas?
DB not a BB
not a hard take. more like a widely believed fact.
you're right
DB is a BB
shorting DB stock last year in april has been one of the best shorts I've made in my life
Up almost 50% since then? Unless this is a shitty joke
Most people are idiots and new generations are getting dumber.
I agree with you that new generations are getting dumber. It is a problem of our society.
Not sure how legit this is but yeah: https://www.sciencealert.com/iq-scores-falling-in-worrying-reversal-20t…
Social media is a net negative to society.
Also designed to be addicting. It's no wonder CEO's of these platforms don't allow their children to use it - it's designed to be destructive to its users
This is far too obvious to be a hard take
I wish electric cars weren't a thing.
Why
i like V10-V12 engine supercars. Issue is a lot of euro countries are headed in the direction of banning the production of gasoline engine cars all together in favor of electric cars. I had no issue with electric cars; but legislation that is intending to kill gasoline powered cars is troublesome.
Baseball is not a sport
What's your stance on softball
it's a game. Baseball and softball are games.
Interesting point. I have always thought that baseball is a sport.
A correctly prepared well-done steak is better than medium rare
Interesting take. Now when u say 'medium rare' are u talking about the scientific definition of 125-135 degrees or how it is prepared at a restaurant/steakhouse? Just came across an article recently talking about how steakhouses are purposely undercooking steaks because of price of meat and other factors. For them, it makes sense as no product is lost undercooking and sending it back to further cook it, where as when they overcook a steak, theres no -uncooking it and the entire product is lost.
Oxymoron level: 100
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My man, you are smoking some flaming cock
The idea of work being "empowering" for women was promoted by the corporations and governments of the world simply to increase tax revenue and depress wages by increasing the labor supply by 50%
James Harden is the most talented player in team sports
Edit: this didn't age well
New hardest takes: -Kawhi is the most underrated player in team sports -Lebron will win a championship with LA
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Boneless wings are just chicken fingers
come at me
chicken fingers?
![https://schol.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/raw-chicken-feet.jpg?w=645][h…]
Christianity is true.
Hard take: the kids AREN'T getting softer. Despite how the media keeps blabbering about millennial this, millennial that, I don't buy it. I view the "everyone's a winner" and the more militant politically correct stuff as old fashioned baby boomer stuff that's on it's way out. History goes in cycles, and we're at one extreme end of the pendulum now, and it's about to swing back to the other direction. My evidence for this, look at how Jordan Peterson basically rose from complete obscurity after just posting a couple lectures on YouTube. Or, look at the rise of various online men's communities (if you know, you know. Allz I'm saying).
its all bs, the boomers just dont want to fall out of relevance so they keep bringing up how they are so much better than the younger generation even though they barely know how to send an email.
Incels, Proud Boys, men's rights activists, and NoFappers are the softest people on the fucking planet. Am I missing anything?
So is Jordan Peterson. Imagine having a pseudo father figure to tell a bunch of losers to clean their room and reject postmodernism
Women like one inch Willie's
Chuck Rhodes Sr is the best character on Billions
$ Bill & Wags are the best. don't @ me
It was pretty funny when he rammed Spiro's Porsche with his mini van
Game of Thrones appeals to the lowest common denominator which is why its so popular
People that are obsessed with prestige lack personality.
Long Tesla
this was my hard take in 2017
Long Elon Musk
What is your hard take in 2019?
I hope you had taken profit mate
I hope you followed this in 2019.
^
I had a take in a 'hot takes' group on fb where I said that it's false to assume that "white people" have no taste when most of the top chefs in the world (by Michelin stars or whatever) are of Caucasian origin. Not that they are better per se, but that the original assumption about them having no taste is wrong imo. They kicked me out for it.
The James Bond films lost their touch after Daniel Craig came on board. I know they're trying to be more 'modern', 'down to earth', etc all that, but that's not what Bond is about. I love the silly over the top adventures of Connery/Moore/Brosnan/Dalton/Lazenby. The new Bond films (Casino Royale onwards), albeit decent thrillers, are not what I want to see in a Bond film.
you are very eloquent
agree
Also, religion should *at best* be used as a moral guideline to live your life. If you believe the ancient fiction that happens in religious texts, you're a moron.
edit: Also, this comes from one that was baptized and confirmed.
NDAs are useless, unenforceable, a waste of time, and only exist to let lawyers bill hours.
Headshot
Too true
Joe Biden is a creepy old man
Private equity firms add almost no value and are vastly overpaid for risking other people's money, waiting for deals to come inbound, financial engineering their gains, and hiring other people to do the dirty work.
Buyside investment bankers add even less value.
Make sure your sex parts and drive align. The old saying "well he/she is good at oral" will go away with marriage. You are only left with the sex you want to have.
dude i read this 4x i have no idea what you're saying i eat butthole 4 years into marriage tho
kids though?
"i eat butthole 4 years into marriage"
Absolute carnivore.
Social media is destroying society, one like at a time.
Nirvana's music is trash and the world is better off without Kurt Cobain.
(Courtney Love definitely did it though)
Modern banking (with its origins with the Medicis and with John Law and the French) undergirds all of advanced human civilization. Alexander Hamilton is the most important American founding father (even more important than George Washington) because he understood this. People who don't understand the basics of banking, finance, and supply and demand are woefully uneducated regardless of the degree and institution on their resume, which is why you have a generation of people who are ostensibly the most "educated" who hate banks and capitalism and are obsessed with their delusions about Marxism.
London, New York, and Hong Kong enjoy outsized wealth and influence because, despite what people FEEL, finance is the beating heart of modern civilization and the market, free of coercion, intuitively understands that fact.
Great point.
You realize John Law almost single-handedly caused the French Revolution by creating a currency bubble and a stock bubble similar to the South Sea Company
I do, and yet his ideas ultimately succeeded and are standard for virtually every successful nation today. He and the French were just too far ahead of their time as they didn’t understand how to manage their ideas.
its only basics.
Thoughts of fractional reserve banking?
Umm, I think it makes a lot of sense. Trial and error showed us its short-comings and federal insurance and oversight largely eliminated bank runs and cash shortages.
That's my point about John Law and the French. They did not have hundreds of years of trial and error but were largely headed down the right path; however, they had to suffer the consequences for being first movers.
Philadelphia is a vastly underrated city.
Pennsylvania has the best ice cream out of all 50 states
I'll piggyback. Portland is fucking garbage. Trash heap of a city
Would like to add SF into the list
I'm on board with PA being underrated overall. I spent a lot of time over the years in Pitt, Philly, and the Lehigh Valley, and think all three are very nice in their own way.
Great cities, just overlooked because of the shitty weather I think
Philly is a whole city of garbage people
People with beards are just people without beards who haven't shaved in a while.
People who drive slow in the left lane should not be allowed to procreate.
Donald Trump is the same as every other President of the modern era, he just isn't articulate enough to lie and make you feel better about yourself that he's your President.
People who drive slow in the left lane should be dragged out of their car and beaten, possibly to death.
Something is fundamentally wrong with you if you drive slow in the left lane.
The oppressive liberal in me wants to fight you for that last one, but the realist in me has to acknowledge how powerfully correct it is.
I disagree with the first one, there is a difference between a person who intentionally grows a beard versus someone who doesn't shave. Its like comparing someone is naturally gifted versus someone with talent who grids. Effort, my dear brethren. Quality beards tell no lies
Elon Musk or Billy McFarland
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